Awesome.

Do you know what it's like to be under a pile of homework thinking you won't sleep for days, just so you can get it done... and still be able to just smile for no reason?

or to be driving down the road, walking to class, etc... and just feel like you're being hugged?

or to just want to giggle at the most random times?


Sometimes, I feel like I might explode with laughter and excitement. I want to go for a run to just get the giggles and antsy feelings out of me, not to escape from life.

I haven't been in this place, in a long, long time. And if I'm being real honest, probably never. I remember at the beginning of this semester, writing about the joy of the Lord - and what that feels like, and that what I thought it was before was so small in comparison.

That comparison has grown. I literally have fallen asleep smiling.

The other day, my professor said a profound statement: happiness is fleeting. I just wanted to raise my hand and say, but joy is constant.

I started writing this blog, and then thought about how unhappy I was at this time last year - so I went back and read some old blogs. Ironically, I wrote a blog on this very day, about one hour from right now. "God with us" - how beautiful.

It is the end of semester, the time when thousands of students across the country are frazzled, lacking sleep, and going crazy. Coffee shops probably have booming business. I am not (that) stressed. Yeah, I have things to do. But, I think sometimes as college students we make this time stressful - we let life get us down. Unless, we let the peace of Christ rule our hearts.

I was telling a friend just yesterday about my low level of stress, and that I know it is only because of the Lord, I repeat - only.

It was interesting this past weekend, that the sermon at our church was about having more peace and being more thankful. Our God is not stressed, He's got everything under control. He is also not a God of stress - He's a God of peace.

Nor does the Bible ever mention a change of circumstances that allowed peace. Peace and joy are non-circumstantial. We have to find the awesome in every situation. And like bowling, the best things happen when you let go.

Work in Progress.

A friend gave me the idea to focus on one verse for a week... to pray about what things I need to work on and have God change in me.

This week, my verse is from Philippians 4 -- "Always be full of joy in the Lord." Too often I let things in my life, the things of this world, affect my attitude and spirit.

Instead of going into Santa Fe this week for church, I decided to just have some alone time and listen to a sermon from my church back home, Hillside. And, total God thing that I did - because the sermon I listened to was from Philippians 1, talking about joy.

I love the book of Philippians, and I love even more when I read it with new eyes. Verse three starts with "every time" - meaning EVERY time, not dependent on circumstances. "Every time I think of you..." meaning his joy and gratitude for those people wasn't based on circumstances or past events. He was thankful for them and filled with joy just because they were fellow believers sharing in their relationship with Christ.

There is also joy in knowing God is not done working in each of us. We're all "under construction."

Happiness is based on circumstances. Joy goes beyond that, and comes from my relationship with God.

"Don't pursue happiness, pursue joy. While happiness is rooted in circumstances, joy is rooted in relationship with Christ."