At the end of April, I realized I had rarely prayed specifically for things. I was getting closer to moving and needing to find a job, so what better circumstance to ask God for specific things. As I was telling some friends in my life about the specific prayer request (that needed to happen in three days), one told, "Belief is a big part of that."
It sounds so obvious, but I was so convicted upon realization of how I may not have been believing. It wasn't that I was praying with the mindset of, "I don't know if God will really do this..." or questioning God, but it wasn't full belief. I wasn't praying with the mindset of, "God, You are sovereign. I know that you can do this. I believe that you will do this if it's in Your will."
But, now I am.
God has answered so many requests and desires over these past few weeks. I am continually in awe of His provision, even in the smallest of things that aren't even that important - like having a laundry room.
So, to make all of this come full circle, last night I stumbled upon Mark 9:23, "What do you mean, 'If I can'?" Jesus asked. "Anything is possible if a person believes.
The next verse goes on to say, The father instantly cried out, "I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!"
At first, I thought, I don't have unbelief. I believe in Christ, I believe in the gospel. But, how many times have I doubted God? I can't even imagine trying to count the number of times in my life, but just over the last few months? I'm thankful for the people in my life that were encouraging me to keep praying, keep hoping, not to give up. But, I would be lying if I said there were not several moments of doubt in my mind as I got closer to moving, and still didn't have a job or a place to live.
My hope is that I daily see God's hand at work in my life, or around me... that I become more aware of Him, to overcome every shred of doubt.