Monday, August 10, 2009

Changes.

My sister posted one of the greatest Facebook statuses ever tonight: "God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know its me." 

I love this because of the following: 

You are the only one that can change you. If you don't like something about yourself, ultimately.. it's up to you. Others can help or influence, but you have to have the strength and discipline to do it. Even though it hasn't been in a huge way, when I look back to the beginning of the summer, I've realized I've changed. I didn't think I would, that it would just be a normal fun summer. I feel like I've kind of "grown up" just in general, nothing specific. Just comes with the territory of paying bills, buying groceries, living alone and I guess I should throw in traveling. I don't like how envious I become sometimes, but I've been working on it. God has blessed me with so many things, I don't need to be envious of others. 

The biggest part of how I've changed is that my walk with God is stronger. I grew up in the church my entire life... but if I'm being honest with myself, I haven't been living out my faith until this year. I started using that "courage" this quote talks about the last few months. It started with inviting friends to church and bible studies, even though sometimes they didn't end up going. But, one of my new favorite quotes is, "Somewhere, somebody is needing you to be the hands and feet of Christ to them." Sometimes, all you can do is let God shine through your words and actions towards other people. One of my best friends is re-connecting with God for the first time in a long time, and I love watching it. :) And, even more courageous... I'm going to be leading a girl's bible study this semester! Praise Him! 

I've realized a few things about me and guys (the person I usually wish I could change most); I don't need to lower my standards or morals for a guy, and when I come across a few bad apples...  God is just showing me what I don't want. I don't know if I so much as want a boyfriend, but I want my guy-best friend... sometimes I don't want to hang out or vent to my girls, I want a guy, and having one of those before makes it harder to not have one. Something I've been nervous about, and praying about for the last few weeks, is this upcoming year. I can't change people, I can't change their actions. But, I'm in college... where we party and go out. I don't want to be considered two-faced. I want to hang out with my friends, but sometimes that involves going out or partying. Even though I don't drink, I don't like being in that situation sometimes. I don't want to break friendships because of this... but just like I don't want to lower my standards for a guy, I don't want to do it with my friends either. 

I am so excited about this upcoming year... for what God has in store for my friends, family and I. :)

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